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Telling Your Spouse You Want A Divorce


Nobody gets married expecting to get divorced one day, but sometimes things get bad over time. Communication may shut down. You and your spouse may have financial problems. There may be issues such as substance abuse and infidelity.

If you feel as though your relationship cannot be saved, then divorce may be your only option. So once you know that you want a divorce, the next step is to tell your spouse. Will they be on board? In many divorce cases, the feelings are mutual, but you may not know for sure with your spouse, especially if divorce has never been discussed before.

This can be a difficult discussion. There may be yelling and anger involved. What’s the best way to tell your spouse that you’re filing for divorce? Here’s how to go about it.

Have a Dialogue

Instead of coming out and saying “I want a divorce,” have a discussion about your relationship. Your spouse may not know how you feel about the marriage. They may think everything is fine, so ask them how they feel. Do they think divorce is the best option? Maybe they are willing to fix the problem. Perhaps they are open to counseling. If this is the case, you may want to hold off on the divorce.

Choose the Right Time

Don’t have a conversation about divorce right before work or right when your spouse gets home. Also, avoid discussing divorce before having company over or going to an event. Find a time when you are both relaxed and stressors are low.

Discuss Why You Are Unhappy

Don’t beat around the bush. Get to the point as to why you are unhappy. Be calm and clear. You shouldn’t make threats, although the word “divorce” may convince your spouse to shape up.

Have Compassion

Don’t be cold about the situation. Avoid blaming your spouse and try not to be mean and nasty. At the same time, though, be firm and clear about what you want. You don’t have to defend yourself, but make it known that a divorce is in fact what you want. Do be prepared to deal with the fact that your spouse may not agree with your decision. Allow them to feel the way they do. Don’t try to talk them out of it.

Maintain Some Privacy

A divorce is a major decision. Don’t feel the need to go on social media and tell the world right away. Allow for a few days so your spouse can process the information. Discuss how you will tell others, including any children you have. When you’re ready, let your friends and family know you need their support.

Seek Legal Help

A divorce can be stressful before the process even starts. Telling your spouse you want a divorce can be a complicated situation if the feeling is not mutual.

Do you really want a divorce? If so, Fort Lauderdale divorce lawyer Edward J. Jennings, P.A. can help you make it happen. We’ll give you the advice you need. To schedule a consultation, fill out the online form or call 954-764-4330.



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