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What Not to Do If You Are a Victim of Infidelity


When you’re in a relationship with someone, it’s because you trust them. You have no concerns about them looking at other men or women because you know they’ll come home to you.

But what if they don’t? Cheating happens. Many people think their spouse would never cheat on them, but many people do go astray for one reason or another. As the victim, infidelity can be devastating. It can definitely ruin your self-esteem, making you feel less than worthy.

So how should you respond? What you do in the aftermath of cheating can make or break your relationship. Many people make the wrong decisions, causing further issues and heartache. Here are some things you should avoid doing.

Make a Big Decision

Nobody should make a huge decision when they are not in the right emotional state of mind. Strong emotions can cloud your thinking, causing you to make mistakes, like filing for divorce or telling the kids about what happened. You don’t need to do anything right away after finding out about your spouse’s infidelity. Wait for things to settle down first.

Ask for Full Disclosure

As the victim of infidelity, you may think you want all the details about the affair. Was it a one-night stand? Who was it with? Where did they have sex? Asking for all the dirt about your spouse’s affair doesn’t make the situation any better. If anything, it can cause more harm than good, as it can be hard to move on after knowing all these details.

Assume Your Spouse Doesn’t Love You

When it comes to cheating, you cannot make assumptions. While cheating does mean that your spouse betrayed you, it does not mean that they don’t love you. Relationships are complex and there are a variety of reasons why people may cheat. Perhaps your marriage is perfect except for a lack of sex. Maybe your spouse has self-esteem issues and they found someone who was attracted to them. Your spouse likely still loves you but has issues they are dealing with.

Ask Your Spouse to Enter an Addiction Program

This is not a good idea either, as those who cheat on their partners are not necessarily sex addicts. In many cases, they are not getting their needs met in the marriage, so they look elsewhere. A sex addict program will not address any of these issues and will overlook mental health components. These programs don’t do much to change the relationship for the better.

Seek Legal Help

Knowing that your partner has been cheating on you can bring about a lot of anguish, anger, and frustration. You may want to make quick decisions so you can resolve the problem right away, but this may not be a good idea.

Infidelity can be heartbreaking. Should you stay or should you go? Get the advice you need from  Fort Lauderdale divorce lawyer Edward J. Jennings, P.A. Fill out the online form or call 954-764-4330 to schedule a consultation.



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