What You Should Never Say To Your Spouse
Being married means being open and honest with each other. You should feel free to say things that need to be said, even if your spouse may not agree.
At the same, though, there are things that just should not be said, no matter how you feel. There are some phrases and questions you should avoid uttering to your spouse if you want to stay married.
“Maybe We Should Get a Divorce”
Many people drop the D word in the heat of the moment while arguing, but if the thought of ending your marriage is on your mind, chances are, that doesn’t bode well for your marriage. Divorce is a serious event, so joking about it during an argument can be very hurtful for your spouse. It’s a manipulative approach that takes the hope out of your relationship. Divorce can strike fear in the heart of your spouse and make them feel less invested in your marriage.
“You’re Disappointing Me”
Being a disappointment is shameful. Nobody wants to feel like they have let someone down. So if you tell your spouse they are disappointing you, obviously it’s going to upset them. Marriage has its ups and downs and while you will likely be disappointed with your spouse at some point, there are noncritical ways to express your feelings.
“My Ex Would Never Do This”
It is never a good idea to compare your spouse to anyone else, especially to a former lover. Your spouse is not interested in hearing about an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend in any shape or form. Plus, you want to be building up your spouse, not tearing them down. Highlight their strengths instead of belittling them.
“Why Did You Do That?”
Using the word “you” and accusing your spouse of something is never a good idea. Your spouse will feel as though they are constantly being blamed for something, which means they will feel as though they need to defend themselves. Asking them why they did something feels like they are being punished and that you’re questioning their ability to handle situations.
“You Always Do This” or “You Never Do That”
“Always” and “never” are absolutes that make your spouse seem incompetent. Instead of solving your problems, you’re using exaggeration to get your point across, which can cause even more conflict. You’re making your spouse seem stupid. Plus, you’re shutting down communication and making it seem as though you don’t appreciate their efforts. That’s a lot of damage for just one word.
Seek Legal Help
While you should be able to talk to your spouse about almost everything, there are some things you should avoid if you want to keep the peace and avoid divorce.
If your marriage is already headed toward divorce, seek legal help from Fort Lauderdale divorce lawyer Edward J. Jennings, P.A. With our expertise and advice, you can end your marriage with ease. To schedule a consultation with our office, fill out the online form or call 954-764-4330.